Annie | Teen Ink

Annie

February 24, 2014
By KGilbert SILVER, Oxford, Michigan
KGilbert SILVER, Oxford, Michigan
9 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
Satisfaction is the Death of Desire - CM Punk


I personally didn’t understand why. I couldn’t even to process the situation. The same thought tumbled round in my mind. Over and over again, like a music player stuck on loop. Maybe, perhaps I wasn’t even supposed to see this. Maybe, it was just an accident I walked into.
An accident, that was never meant to happen.

“Annie.” I whispered, as tears began to flow down my cheeks, “Why, you do this?”

Annie, who was in the fetal position, slowly raised her head from its place on her knees.

“I don’t…know.” She broke off in a sob that racked her body, causing her to shake. This wasn’t the Annie I knew for 16 years. This wasn’t the bubbly, friendly, kind-hearted, brown-eyed blonde that came to be my best friend. What sat before me was a broken spirit with nothing left to lose, a human being driven to lacerate her skin, deep enough to let her life ooze out of her.

When my senses cleared, I rushed to the closet across from Annie, desperately trying to find the emergency first aid kit. I shoved towels, bars of soap, anything else out of the way that wasn’t the cold metal case I was searching for. Looking for the stupid thing felt like forever, and I kept looking over my shoulder at her to make sure she was still breathing. Relief hit me like an oncoming truck when my fingers felt ice cold steel. I yanked the heavy metal box out of the closet, letting it land on the floor, startling Annie, and shaking the floor enough for bottles to fall off nearby shelves. I opened the case and pulled out everything and anything that could stop the bleeding. I gently took Annie’s wounded wrist into my hands and started wrapping bandages around them.

“Lauren,” she whispered, her voice trembling from her post-sob.

“What happened?” I asked, managing to sound calm and reassuring, despite the fact that I was still panicking on the inside.

“I couldn’t take it anymore. They were just too much.” She replied. I understood what she was talking about. Annie came out a month or two ago to me. She was scared that if she did it to anyone else, they wouldn’t accept her. I accepted her for who she was, because in my opinion, you can’t help who you fall in love with. However, that wasn’t the case for those around her when she started becoming more open about her sexuality. Her mom, the one person who brought her into the world, threw her out while her dad stood there and watched. People who she and I both thought were her friends? Nope. They would call her “Dyke” and “Lesbo”, along with making jokes about her, even her safe haven, the blog site Tumblr, was no escape from the harsh opinions of the world around her. I was the only one who stood at her side. I have told her that their opinions don’t matter, that no matter what, they can’t change who she was. But, they finally got into her.

“They told me that, you would leave me eventually.” She said. I cringed at the mere thought of those kids, sneering at her and telling her that her best friend would leave her, just for being gay. Those were the words that finally pissed me off.

“Don’t listen to them! I have told you again and again, that I will never leave you. I’m your best friend and I have been since were babies! You could be gay or straight and I would still be your best friend! I’ll only stop being your friend when you tell me to.” I said. Annie shyly smiled.

“And I would never say that thought.”

“Then I guess you’re stuck with me for good.” I chuckled, as I finished wrapping up her wrists and started packing away the equipment. I put away the supplies and helped Annie to her feet.

“But Annie,” I spoke, locking her gaze with my own, “If you ever feel like doing this again, promise that you will come to me, please come to me first! I’m always here for you, even if I’m just a shoulder to lean on.” I wrapped my arm around her shoulder, squeezing her tight.
“I promise, Lauren. But, I have no intention of doing this again.” Annie replied, revealing her brightest smile. I saw the determination in her eyes, showing me that she would try her hardest to keep her promise. Knowing that, she has never broken one.


The author's comments:
This piece was inspired by discussions I happen to hear everyday. I also wanted to create a story that could connect with even a few members of my audience. I know a few people around me who struggle with depression, self-harm, self-esteem issues in general, and though, I have not dealt with any of these issues.

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